Real Life Births on Christmas Day

The babies are not beautiful yet... but we are all very proud!
So far we have three hatchlings. The fourth egg seems to be stubbornly staying unhatched so I guess that means three is our lucky number

funny

Christmas Lights

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to you all

Tonight's the Night!

Look at the sky!
Enjoy the moon!

Full Moon Warning

OK... I warned you... full moons mean mischief..
The next one is going to be a doozy.. due on Tuesday and some kind of special eclipse going on with it too... Can't wait!
(Checks prescription to make sure that she has all necessary cheerying drugs to survive it)
It's going to be a total lunar eclipse, and had I been having my harbour cruise one day later, I could have watched the eclipse from a boat while sipping fruity cocktails celebrating Christmas in Sydney.

Switch to Summmer

While Caledon is snow bound, in RL it is summer and I had to do something to celebrate....We have had lots of long awaited rain and the air is filled with butterflies and bugs...

Mr and Mrs Claws

more Moppets

School Girl Moppets

I was in the mood to build and was thinking about some of my cute biggee outfits...

In RL

Today I have been so busy in RL. I had a class on tonight and I had to get this finished. I have been really dragging my feet lately getting things done but today I was on full steam ahead.

Taz fell asleep while we were talking. ( I fascinate him, can you tell?) So while he slept, I wrote up the class notes for tonight. He woke just as I was nearly done so then I was able to run back to the sewing machine where I stayed all day except for a slight diversion to rescue a beaten up canary.

(Canary now sleeping in an upside down shopping basket to give him a chance to recover from the bullying)

Finally, with 20 minutes to spare, I was done and the above is the finished product. It's called
"Who's Who"
Pretty cute! We have been advertising the pattern through the store and it is doing quite well which is gratifying and will contribute in a small way to my great plans to build a new home.
Happy day

Feeling Cheerful

Uhhu.. that's right.. cheerful and positive and maybe even relaxed....
Still dont have the answers but I will go and watch House and not worry for now
:)

Hunky Dorey

I have woken hunky dory
What a phony I am!
Not that I want to be consistent with the kind of misery that was my last few days and what a blessed relief!

Today's thought:

I love living "these days"
I love living with a mobile phone that can call most places on the planet at a moment notice for a price that isn't ruinous.
I love living in a time when you can chat and play with other people anywhere... and time.
I am not a political beastie. I am not at all into nationalism. I think it stands between good people and common sense. I love the Internet's multinational forum. How it equalises. Where only someone's behavior is their marker, not their wealth or their colour. I love that.
I love that we can meet and make friends of people anywhere. I love that we can fall in love anywhere.

More and more I hear people say they met on line. My mother is terrified of it. Ax murderers and all. I do remind her that as many poorly behaved people - more- can be found at a pub.

I know it isn't all roses. I know it is open to fails just like the old lives we knew. I actually pity those who haven't experienced it and judge from ignorance. It's not just on-line dungeons and dragons (no malice intended to all D&Ders), a special niche for a special group, I deeply believe that this is the path to our future.

I don't think this is the end point and I don't have so much imagination that I will try to predict where it is going, but this is the path to the future.

Exciting!

Half a tablet later...

Ok.. so I took it.. (the pill as mentioned earlier)
turns out it isn't a silver bullet. It hasn't frightened the spooks out of my head. I don't feel any change yet and apparently that is to be expected. Up to 6 weeks the pharmacist told me it could take before I feel the effects.
Crikey.
There is no way I will be able to pretend to RL that I am hunkey dorey for that long

Attention Seeking

Something you see a fair bit of in SL is attention seeking. I think I know what it is. I think it is me too.
Feeling hollow and wanting to be filled.
I guess the trick is to fill yourself.
Some trick
I hate having a clear vision of myself. It would nice to be attention seeking and not realise it. Just go out, make a fuss, enjoy it and move on to the next bout.

But I do see myself fairly clearly. Maybe a little unkindly. But I would rather add a few warts to my "warts and all" view of myself than wander around blaming everyone else for my current state.

I took myself to the doctors this week and have come up with a trifecta. Depression, stress and anxiety. Slightly less anxiety but a goodish portion none-the-less.

I have a prescription for anti-depressants. My first. I walked round with it yesterday without getting it filled. It was a comfort to me that it was there.. That it could help if I needed it. I thought maybe carrying it was all I would need.

Today I need to go fetch those drugs. Today I relied on some one to fill the hole and he couldn't. How can I say that is his fault? Should he have tried? Is he just tired of trying?
I don't know. But I do know I need some help and I need to be responsible. So I am waving good bye to the high happies. And I am hoping so much to say goodbye to the lows.

Next piece of AudSLife is going to be MedicatedAudSlife :)
I grin wryly

(and I wonder.. how is it possible to swing so vastly over hours. Is this what depression is supposed to be? Aren't I supposed to curl up into a ball and not move from my bed? How come I can get up go to work, crack jokes, then curl into a ball and sob, then get up and do it all again?)

Heart of Gold

This morning I walked into SL to make a very hard thing happen. I was coming to pack up my homes. I wandered round Brissa (the cheap one) and decided that it was cheaper than anywhere else and if I could possibly afford to stay anywhere, I could perhaps keep that... So I went to Caledon Downs to pack up there. My bunnies hopped round me, the butterflies flittered round... and before I knew it, I had paid my meters another week.

I couldn't do it.

I hopped into ISC and confessed that I hadn't been able to pack up after all, and that I would remain landed for another week.
A voice popped up on screen and a sum of money tumbled into my account. I have an anonymous donor. Some one who would like me to stay a little longer. The sum of money passed back and forth for a while. I am not comfortable with such generosity. It is not like I am poor at all. It is just that I need to use what I have in RL now.
So I am the humblest person in Caledon and thank the anonymous donor from the bottom of my heart

Warning

Alert
Warning
Take Care

I have officially had my melt down this week, so I don't need to worry about it, but for the rest of you.. the full moon is about to arrive. if you are feeling itchy and unsettled, now is the time to go find a quiet and comforting spot to go sit this one out

Two years

Two years ago, plus a few weeks, I went to a dance to celebrate the launch of Soliel Snook's new garden centre.
I was with Eleanor and I remember lamenting that there wasn't a whole lot of chat in local chat. We decided that most of the conversations must be going in IM. Eleanor and I spied a new comer to the ranks. Tzaiqan Belgar.
This avatar was dancing with Autopilotpoppy Patty. The assumption that Eleanor and I made was that no two week old newbie was going to make it to a dance in the thick of Caledon company, and escort one of our grand ladies. He had to be an alt.
At the time there had been a run of Alts messing round with people so we were not being quite as nuts as you might think making that assumption.

I was therefore even more mystified about who this Tzaiqan really was when a few days after the dance he IMed me with a "hello, I noticed you at the dance". My suspicions ran over time but I was most curious to discover who this person really was.
Well. It wasn't at all what I thought. Instead what I had on my hands was a charming and flirtatious pom who didn't quite know the way we did things. Following his own rules, he read my profile, decided he would like to say hi and did.

We enjoyed our company for a few weeks. I don't know what Taz was expecting, but I wasn't thinking of much more at the time. we chatted about partnership and what it was. My opinion was that it was an agreement between two people. It is whatever they want to make it as SL was not the real world, defined by RL laws.

We spent more and more time together and finally found ourselves at a dreadful Elvis impersonator's dance. A third party decided to cause a fuss and somehow I was put under pressure by the fuss maker to choose Taz.. or not. Well one thing.. I shouldn't have felt that pressure. Second thing: I have never regretted making the decision.

Taz and I partnered: a commitment to get to know each other better. We did, and we still do two years later

For taz

for taz

hello

hi!
This weekend is looking like packing up sl weekend
Bye
I will wander around a while yet but ...

Guess I should do a goodbye to my homes photo spread but I can't muster the energy

I will let my mind carry the images maybe

Why I have lost my Mojo

I loved building in SL but some things have changed how I spend my time
I have been busy in RL
The bunnies over ran my mind for some months ( I am cured now)
At home some one decided to put me at the end of a wireless modem instead of plugged straight into the phone line and now i lag a lot more
Worst of all has been the change of screen since the new version of SL viewer came in.

Before:

After:

I am not one of those who resisted the change. I took it up as soon as it became available. I didn't moan. I went about getting used to it. And now I have to say... I loath the way my screen is filled with clutter that used to all fit nicely.

More Moppet Time

This morning, when I had promised myself I would clean the house or something.. I noticed that I hadn't made a vendor of Christmas Moppets. The Vendor is a one-prim, 9 item one, and I only had 7 Christmas items so far.. so I figured.. time to make another couple of Christmas outfits
I also figured that something winter and general would do better than Christmas specific

So here we have his and her snow suits

playing with the mob

I remember seeing a photo Edward Pearse made of his household with Christine. I wondered if it was a large collection of friends or cleverness and photoshopping
I have spent some time tonight, a little short of cleverness, but playing with images none the less and here is the Fotherington Family
On the left is Devon. Devon Berliner. Two sandwich meats here in Australia. Stupid name, ugly avatar. He is a poor cousin to the girls. He wears freebies form Oxbridge and his one quality, if you can call it that, is his height.
When Audrey builds stairs, its his job to check it for height. He gets to wear the bruises to prove that the clearance wasn't high enough. In return he gets very little but an outing now and then. Poor fellow
Little Audz Mubble is a fashion conscious young lamb. She has a full wardrobe of Moppet fashions and her job is to try them for size and test their permissions. Audrey has been a bit mean lately though and is having all the dress up fun alone. Bah says Audz Mubble.

A few years ago Audrey was having a rough time and it seemed she would never know a moments peace. Heppi was her quiet space. Des let her buy our first home in Caledon- CaledonSouthend. Later when she lost her home in Fathom, Auds bought the two blocks next door from Wrath and lived there very happily for a long time.

Heppi found life in SL a little peculiar. She is Audrey. Just as Devon and Audz Mubble are...The typist is no sort of actress, so they are all the same. However Heppi has a different AO to Audrey
The typist found herself in the position where one particular person liked Heppi and did not like Audrey. it was totally perplexing. And it all boiled down to the AO. Heppi is demure, and Audrey is not :)
If Audrey wasn't having such a lovely time fetching new clothes and skins, it might almost be time to take Heppi shopping. She could do with a few new things.

Oh!! But what wonderful things the inventories of Devon, Heppi and Little Audz are! After 3 years of littering in her inventory, Audrey now has 32K items. Mostly not filed.
The spartan splendor of the cousins' inventories makes me want to play in there with them til they are just as shambollick as Auds :)

Home

A lot of my writing over the last three years has been about home:

At the moment I feel like I am in my end days with SL mainly because I will have to stop owning land for financial reason. So for now i am throwing a bit more time and energy enjoying my SL homes properly before I have to leave them.

This is where my bunnies used to live. The bunnies have all but gone now, so finally i am moving prims, and getting myself comfortable.
This sim is amazing. Syn does wonderful deals with land and these prims cost me only 1.18L per prim per week.
I just might be able to afford to keep this one block when it is all said and done, but I am torn then because my Caledon land means a lot to me, even though it costs more. It means more for several reasons, and not the least has been the care that Des has taken of me at a few difficult times. I will continue to procrastinate over the decision for as long as possible. Fortunately, without those ravenous bunnies chewing up my money, rent in SL doesnt seem so bad.

Runs Cold

My blood runs cold when I see the games some people play with the lives of innocent and trusting people.
In Rl and SL I watch as people are manipulated. It's hard to know what to do. Do you mind your own business? Is that what a citizen of the world does?
So far I have no proof that interfering helps at all, so I stay uninvolved, but feel guilty.
When I first joined SL I felt there was an interest in the social development inside SL. There was discussion about immersion and role play. Society and peer pressure to behave appropriately. I haven't seen much of that lately, but maybe I haven't been looking.
I have a lot of time for the way SL helps people bond and interact. I am interested in how we behave with each other.

I have heard often enough people seeking to avoid "drama".
I guess I am not one of them exactly. Drama is life to me. It is feelings and emotions. It is what happens when people interact and things don't go perfectly. And how can they?
I wish to be involved in the lives of people. I feel dead when I do not share the emotions of anyone around me.

But I draw the line at creating dramas.

Drama creators:
Two sorts that I know of:
Attention seekers who are crying over one thing or another. I have some patience for these. I feel sorry that their lives need this drama to fill an emptiness. I try not to be one of these but maybe I am too public with my hand wringing at times so I won't pretend to be above this category.

The one I have no time for is the one who uses other people to create situations. That person gloats like a puppet master, messing and deceiving. Lies and more lies. Drawing in innocents in a greedy bid to make their false world bigger and bigger. This behavior isn't a game, it isn't role play because only one person has the whole truth. It is manipulative and it is a disgrace.

a facade

On my budget, it could look like this. Not grand, but it has a roof. Now to get the builder to come in on budget with his quote

And Comments are Back on....

After a small break to let a matter settle, comments are now back on the blog :)

Leaving Downs

It is close to time: Time for RL to get my attention. It is tinged with sadness, but as I build a new home in RL I must close my homes in SL. I am putting my lovely home at Caledon Downs on the market. I would like to find it a new owner. One who will be faithful, and tasteful and creative and a steady payer of tier and otherwise a genuine right sort for Caledon!
http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/Caledon%20Downs/121/127/44

something clever from Reghan

left or right brained?
http://www.ataliba.eti.br/files/u1/giragira-21102007.gif
which way does she turn for you?

So
Anti Clockwise?
How does this match you?
uses logic
detail oriented
facts rule
words and language
present and past
math and science
can comprehend
knowing
acknowledges
order/pattern perception
knows object name
reality based
forms strategies
practical

Clockwise?
uses feeling
"big picture" oriented
imagination rules
symbols and images
present and future
philosophy & religion
can "get it" (i.e. meaning)
believes
appreciates
spatial perception
knows object function
fantasy based
presents possibilities
impetuous
risk taking

Halloween

It is almost that time!
I am not really much of a Halloween person.. but as my last hurrah with the bunnies, I have set them all breeding to see if we can hatch some special treat bunnies.

So far I have kindled a dozen nests I guess and have managed to get three elite bunnies. Two are frankenbunnehs and one Jack-o-bunneh I have a few more bunnies to get to nest but as each pair does, I have packed each of them up. This is the end.. or close to for me and the bunnies i may keep just a couple of special ones out for decoration, but the rest are going into hibernation for a while.

Last Volare-Gray BBB at Caledon

Fogwoman and Vivito

Here is an upside to being sick... I was home for the last BBB held by the Gray-Volares. Seeing lots of the old faces of Caledon. New ones too!
Dancing and chatting to my old friend Eleanor, talking about Caledon's olden days.

What a shame I am not home during the US evening more often.


It has been things like the BBB that have been the glue to hold Caledon together.

Blog Comments

The full moon has passed.. and though I have got a cold, some of the bad juju I was experiencing has eased off a little.
Thank you very much for the comments left to cheer me up. They did help a lot.
I am sure in previous bloggings I have mentioned my moon issues... hence the moon chart on the side bar :)

Not Quitting

Yesterday I wrote a sad piece. I debated leaving it so public and exposed. I nearly removed it because I worry what people think. But in the end, because this is my space for me, I left it there. It is where I am and maybe in the future I will look at that day and be grateful it is behind me.
This morning I decided to close this blog down.
I have spent 30 minutes trying tabs to find one that takes it off line without losing what this is to me: my diary. Just keep it, tucked away and private. Not to be added to and not to be lost.

Then I read my post about learning to make my googley eyes blink from back in April. I remembered the pleasure that gave me.
And it has made today possible.
So Audrey's blog lasts another day... and maybe I won't leave SL today

Real Stuff

In the last week there has been about 20 minutes of Second Life.
This month I am house hunting, job hunting, making a quilt for a class and making one for a magazine that saw the first few blocks of the class quilt and wanted me to make a project for them. Oh! And I have to do my tax in the next 6 days! And have mum come to visit.
So far I have ticked 4 of 6 boxes.
It has meant a weaning.
Audrey stands along in SL in the background while I have spent time at the computer attending to some of these things. Poor Auds.

The house hunting has been fun. I half considered building a house in sl to the scale of my real life imaginary, best case scenario house. Still mulling it over.
In the last few months it has been really tough for Auds and for me. Seems to most intents and purposes Auds' life is over. Thought maybe mine too. The rush of things to do has given me a bit of a future. Not sure if it is enough.

So what happened?

Poor old blog has been so neglected.
What happened isn't just one thing but a number of things.
Firstly: the rabbits. Time consuming, thought consuming, money consuming and ultimately unsatisfactory.
I was addicted. Every day hatching a few more, pairing them, looking forward to seeing what new traits I could unravel. Basically, over the course of time I spent a huge amount of money, unravelled the gene pool and then looked at what I had and it isn't worth it. It has not been an artistic endeavour. It hasn't fed my soul. It didn't enrich my life with interesting people.
I am deleting bunnies now. Hundreds of them. I have a few left. But as each pair nests and goes back to breeding cool down, I look at them and ask.. do I care what offspring they have? The answer is almost always "no" and then I pull them into inventory and let them hibernate.

Second? RL. Three years of sitting at the computer and it is time to step out again. I have joined a gym, work more days a week and simply don't have the time any more.

Third? I can't be bothered starting again. So many of my friends in sl have also pulled back or moved on and I can't muster the energy to explore new relationships. I tried back tracking to an old one but that didn't work either.

Fourth? Now that I am working more days, I am not often on-line when the rest of the world is, so it is the lonely ozzy hours that I walk around.

So I think I can see my time in sl drawing to an end. Slow and gradual. No bitterness and just a little sadness. I am hosting a Quilt Exhibition in Caledon this coming weekend. After canvasing for entries for a month, I have received two. In my opinion, that reflects the community that was once was Caledon. I don't know what people want from Caledon any more. It doesn't seem that they want the community that was once there.

As I said, I am not bitter about this at all, but a little sad to see the passing of something that was so important to me, a life line for me in its time

In my bones

I can feel it is time to change

Mum's not too bright.. but look at dad!

Relay for Life

It's that time of year again! Caledon's Relay for Life build team is being lead by Mr Volare. A wonderful bunch of builders have been attending meetings... and I have not. 5 am ozzie morning time!

So while I was invited to join them, as time passed it seemed less and less likely that i would be able to contribute.
Finally I was free of other commitments and on line at the same time as the rest of the world and I contacted Miss Fog and Mr Volare and was encouraged to take on the forecourt for the build they had begun up on the platform above their sim

It seemed a huge job.
Especially when I wasn't feeling up to speed on the big picture. I re-read all my note cards and blundered around with prims for 36 hours. I managed to build a gazebo but little else that was inspiring me.
Finally I went to the actual Relay for Life site and saw our place and was both excited and devastated to see we had topography!
Ditch all original plans. no loss they were dull
.
As it is, what I have built isn't exciting... exactly... but I think it does what it should. Welcomes and entices. Yeh?
Pond

Bridge

Water fowl

Looking after things

Today I made a new frock

I haven't been building much lately. despite me trying to be an advocate for the new viewer... the bottom line is that I can not get the junk out of the way to see what I am doing. It drives me crazy!
And this is not just a quick reaction. A need to get used to it. Instead it is a dawning realization that the came when the newness left.
Mainly it is local chat that bothers me. When it isn't docked.. which it isn't any more.. it is a plain old bloody nuisance!

Anyway.. I did make a new frock.. and I did play with the bunnies...

Where am I?

All over the place! I am here then there then here again then somewhere else!

Bunnies at Rocabranagh

Caledon land is simply too dear to use exclusively for bunnies. It is a great price to commit to have a lovely neighborhood of good people and community and I don't regret it at all and worth every cent besides.. but for sheer volume of prims, I needed an better option. I started hopping here and there. At first I thought I could just rent any prims, that it wouldn't matter what it looked like. So I ended up on mainland. Well after 2 weeks I confess... it does matter what it looks like and what it feels like. So I have moved out of one and into another.

Bunnies at Bashkortostan: Note giant for sale banner

I have also started renting by the beach. It is winter here in oz and I am freezing. I can't tell you what a wonderful thing it was then to sit with Xavier and Taz for an hour of chatter before heading off into a frozen morning on my way to work.
Bunnies by my cove at Hurricane

I whistled for the rest of my RL day because it was just sooooo lovely
All set to have a great day after sitting on cushions chatting before work

Strawberry Festival and elite bunnies

The Strawberry Festival week is upon us. I have no idea, at all, what that means.. except that to celebrate, the makers of our bunnies have deemed that a random number of them will be born "special". There are a few special series out there already. There are alien bunnies that were launched as part of a fundraiser. There are half wrapped in gold foil bunnies from Easter. There are a special elite bunny that only arrives in the last 3 litters of a rabbit. There are hardly any of those around. Every time one of my girls gets to that certain age.. i cross my fingers but so far, I hadn't had a single elite. Then low and behold! I got one yesterday morning! how lucky I thought! So I went into a hatching frenzy.... now I have 7!

Caledon Tanglewood

I have passed the Caledon Tanglewood property on to a new owner. With Bunny food and so many bunny prims to pay for, I needed to cut back. Tanglewood isn't one of my most expensive places... but with fewer prims it is less economical. Always those few left over prims that can't be utilized. Anyway, a parting photo of Bunyip Bend

Spamming Comments

I am hating these Chinese spamming comments.
I look forward to seeing who said what when i see a comment posted. It s such a disappointment to find " I love your business" or something I can't even read!!
Sighs and wastes 5 minutes deleting more stupid comments

Oh I do like to be beside the sea side

When I run out of things to do in SL.. I build

Tonight there is uproar as Lindens get sacked left right and centre.
Is this the end? The beginning of the end?
Don't ask me, I can't be bothered worrying about that now.

For me it is creating blue skies and sunny seas.... and escaping reality

A result!

So I bought the bunny warren...
and I fed the bunnies for weeks
I have given them all the surname Heath so I can tell which come from the warren quickly without having to remember. Heath because they sit on hay, which reminds me of Famous 5 who were forever making beds of heath...
Anyway I got a common gem here, the occasional half lop there... and a whole host of bunny genetic mess. And I was having to hatch lots of nests just to keep the boy:girl ratio sorted. I have been trying to give away all the boys i have accumulated but the action there is slow.
Anyway, a diamond eye came up a few days ago. Thats a bit better than the amethyst ones I had been getting.
Then yesterday I got a full lop, amethyst eyed, radiant amber dutch. Dutchies are my favourites.. but I have a trillion of them already... but still it was a good one.
Cute, huh?
I didn't dare think that my bunnies were warming up to anything but still I held my breath as usual today as I did the rounds....
Lexi Heath, a first generation warren bunny was sitting with a nest......
(that's Lexi in the front)


and nearby lurked a second generation bunny, Rusty. Clearly tuckered out form messing with his aunt!

I touch the nest... and...

Mother: Lexi Heath
Father: Rusty Heath2
Fur: Argent - Creme d'Argent
Eyes: Dark Pink
Ears: Half-a-Lop
Shade: Classic
Creme d'Argents are rapidly becoming common, but are the last rare-ish thing left now. And besides that! they are sooooo pretty.. don't you think?

Above Caledon Downs

A new space I have created-very restful

Bunny Mania

Now I explained that some rabbits are rarer than others?
Well I think the truth is.. nothing is rare enough! Or not long anyway!
I got keen to be ahead of things and bought the warren. I couldn't breed those bunnies fast enough and so far the best they have come up with is a bit of a lop and a diamond eye.
Quite unimpressive.

So I put my hand in my pocket and bought two Hotots.

The Eyeliner Bunny
So far my experience has been that buying without research has meant a lot of wasted money as bunnies have thrown random babies. So I chose bunnies with a good background. ~Foggy~ and ~Henrietta~.
These two little bunnies did what they should and after they turned 7 days old, they mated and I added Hot to Trot to my warren. He is a charming boy, just like his dad. No naughty recessive.
I placed him for sale and in a week I haven't had one single interested buyer. Sigh
Now his sister has arrived. I have decided to rent a place in a more populated place but I have this sneaking suspicion that all the markets are populated by people just like me.. people trying to sell bunnies that started too late.
As soon as I can gather enough strength of mind, I will gather my bunnies and pop them into inventory. No point giving them away at the poor prices that bunnies are now attracting.
The up side has been that in the last month I have seen more of SL than in the two years before.
Also I have seen a lot of better building. I think the places I have stayed have become complacent.
I am going to have to figure out how I am going to do better sculpties as the world is marching on!

So, anyway!
I have put Hot to Trot and Hetty Trot for sale together as sibblings.

When you mate siblings you can get mutants so it can attract a premium.
They are up for offers at Moon Rise.

I have a stall there and have peppered photos of the sim here.
It's a cute place :)