Thursday, August 20, 2015

heartache

Reach a point where life is too hard.  Bound by duty and love of others to put one foot ahead of the other and repeat.  And repeat. 
Wondering. 
People say they love me.  I believe them. But they don't give me what i desperately need.  I don't ask for riches. I don't ask for hard things. All i ask for is love the way I'd like it. I'm not not asking for hardship from anyone. Is respect a hardship. Is touch a hardship. 
How did i get to be so old and never find anyone to love me as I'd like. I can only think after two marriages and four kids it must be somehow my fault but i don't know what i did.  I don't know how to make it better and i don't know how to face tomorrow without a clue that the test of my life will be any better.